(Saturday, April 10, 2010)
“It’s What’s Inside That Counts”
Many years ago, I was told that if you really want to know what’s in a tube of toothpaste, you have to squeeze it. If you really want to know what a person is made of, look at what comes out when they are squeezed.
This journey has not been easy for our children. There is obviously never a good time for a family when it comes to something like this, but it does seem that this was an especially difficult time for Jenny, Emily and Adam to have my “nasty little diseases” added to their plates.
They are married with young children. Two grandchildren were born in October. When Megan and Avery were born, I was just beginning the process of discovering the diagnosis of my problems. Andrew will be 5 in less than a month and Austin will be 4 at then end of this month. At that age, they require a lot of attention. Emily and Adam have sold their houses since my diagnosis. Emily moved from Texas to Florida. Adam quit his job as a police officer and started law school only months before my diagnosis. Emily is in the final semester of course work for her Ph.D. before she starts her dissertation. Jenny not only helps run my office but is incredibly active in her church and women’s Bible study. She is way too busy. (I wonder where she got that from?)
Patra and I could not be more proud of them. They have been squeezed and some incredibly wonderful stuff has come out. They have proven themselves and probably proven to themselves that they are more capable than they could have ever imagined.
They keep up with us and are always willing to help in any way. I’m sure they have been outside their comfort zone on a number of occasions but they have hung in there.
When friends have offered to help, we responded “thanks, but Jenny, Emily and Adam are helping.”
The Bible says that children are to honor their father and mother. You have honored us through this process.
In the best possible way, I don’t believe that our relationship will ever be the same as it was before. Sure, you will still laugh at some of the things Mom and I say and do. And Mom and I will still question some of your choices. That is a parental prerogative I am not willing to give up. But I still believe our relationship will be different. I remember with my own parents there came a time when it seemed in some respects that I had become the parent and they were the children. Our relationship was still wonderful but it was different. Now, because of these “nasty little diseases” Mom and I will need to rely on you more than we have ever had to before. We value your input more because we need your input more than we ever have.
You will always be our children but as you have been squeezed you have responded wonderfully. There was some great stuff inside you.
Jenny, Emily, Adam - I wish you did not have to go through this – honestly, I wish I didn’t have to go through this – but Mom and I could not imagine going through it without you. Thanks.
Bob
Many years ago, I was told that if you really want to know what’s in a tube of toothpaste, you have to squeeze it. If you really want to know what a person is made of, look at what comes out when they are squeezed.
This journey has not been easy for our children. There is obviously never a good time for a family when it comes to something like this, but it does seem that this was an especially difficult time for Jenny, Emily and Adam to have my “nasty little diseases” added to their plates.
They are married with young children. Two grandchildren were born in October. When Megan and Avery were born, I was just beginning the process of discovering the diagnosis of my problems. Andrew will be 5 in less than a month and Austin will be 4 at then end of this month. At that age, they require a lot of attention. Emily and Adam have sold their houses since my diagnosis. Emily moved from Texas to Florida. Adam quit his job as a police officer and started law school only months before my diagnosis. Emily is in the final semester of course work for her Ph.D. before she starts her dissertation. Jenny not only helps run my office but is incredibly active in her church and women’s Bible study. She is way too busy. (I wonder where she got that from?)
Patra and I could not be more proud of them. They have been squeezed and some incredibly wonderful stuff has come out. They have proven themselves and probably proven to themselves that they are more capable than they could have ever imagined.
They keep up with us and are always willing to help in any way. I’m sure they have been outside their comfort zone on a number of occasions but they have hung in there.
When friends have offered to help, we responded “thanks, but Jenny, Emily and Adam are helping.”
The Bible says that children are to honor their father and mother. You have honored us through this process.
In the best possible way, I don’t believe that our relationship will ever be the same as it was before. Sure, you will still laugh at some of the things Mom and I say and do. And Mom and I will still question some of your choices. That is a parental prerogative I am not willing to give up. But I still believe our relationship will be different. I remember with my own parents there came a time when it seemed in some respects that I had become the parent and they were the children. Our relationship was still wonderful but it was different. Now, because of these “nasty little diseases” Mom and I will need to rely on you more than we have ever had to before. We value your input more because we need your input more than we ever have.
You will always be our children but as you have been squeezed you have responded wonderfully. There was some great stuff inside you.
Jenny, Emily, Adam - I wish you did not have to go through this – honestly, I wish I didn’t have to go through this – but Mom and I could not imagine going through it without you. Thanks.
Bob
Comments
I love you.
emily
I'm a little too overwhelmed to really think of what else to say in response.
Try not to squeeze us too hard or the sappy, mushy stuff might come out!
Love, Jenny
You truly do have remarkable children. We have gotten to know them better through this time. They have been so good to keep us, your friends, abreast of everything going on in a most timely manner.
We want to say THANK YOU to the Buggs also.
Love and Prayers,
Lex and Linda
Yes, there will be times our children laugh at us, but that is good because we are still able to share the good, bad & ugly as "family"; that is what it is all about!
Take care all of you!
Ted & Carol W
Glad that you are feeling better.
2 Corinthians 2:15